last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
its not stalking. its research.
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
Randomize
