Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(410): View more from Maryland

Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'

(301): View more from Maryland

Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..

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(858): View more from California

in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"

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(734): View more from Michigan

I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.

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(303): View more from Colorado

In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!

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(815): View more from Illinois

So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.

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