If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
Randomize
