You're my little dorito
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
Mom, I'm really sorry you saw my naked ex-boyfriend in the living room this morning. I can explain....but I'd rather just stick with this apology and be done with it
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
