It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
he stole a smokey from the street meat vendor and put it in his pocket when she wasn't looking and now we're drinking avocado margaritas
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
Randomize
