I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
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