we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
Randomize
