a kid in a transformers shirt tried to pick me up last night at work. he also rolled up on a bicycle, the kind with pedals. do i look that easy?
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
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