ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
I need to align my fucking chakras
Randomize
