I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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