I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
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