I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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