what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
