god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
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