and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
Randomize
