"it" just moved
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
Randomize
