hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
Randomize
