I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
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