it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
Randomize
