The guy dancing on me has three visible teeth. WHERE ARE YOU?
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
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