I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize