so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Randomize
