Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
So I'm on the can right now reading a court transcript for an appeal. Some dude is paying $155 an hour for me to take a shit.
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
I woke up to three texts telling me to "go fuck myself," a panicked voicemail from my mom, and a girl thanking me... I'm not sure which I should take care of first
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
