No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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