The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
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