we have pet lesbian snakes
Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
update: the house isnt on fire anymore, but he is still pissing on all your stuff.
the house was on fire??
shit I thought I told you.
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
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