May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
The producers of Marley and Me owe me about $5 million. That's the dollar amount of embarrassment compensation required for making a 24-year-old male cry publicly on an airplane while sitting in the middle seat between a gorgeous babe and a guy with a do-rag
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
Dignity is for republicans.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
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