lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
Randomize
