worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
did i walk over a car last night?
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
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