none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
i just caught my roommate coming out of the bathroom half naked with a surge protector. he told me he didn't wanna talk about it.
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
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