i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
She swung at the pinata with crutches
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
Randomize
