just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
I want you to know. From the bottom of my heart, that you are a great friend, a beautiful person, and one of my favorite people in this world. But if you ever send me that many messages again at 4am I swear to God, I will push you in from of a fast running rhino
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
Randomize
