would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
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