all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
Woke up in a pile of people on the floor. His dad was already up and ask me to help him cook bacon because "7 lbs can be a mother fucker"
I either need to get adopted or have someone's baby, but I'm joining that family
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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