I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
There's a Russian superstition that you'll spend your year the way you celebrate New Year's, so I'm honestly not that surprised you're drunk.
Randomize
