I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
you handed me the dorito you were about to eat and told me to 'keep him safe' while you went to the bathroom
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Randomize
