Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
only you would photoshop your dick
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize