dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
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