There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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