just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
Randomize
