At least make sure they are 18
Why
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
Randomize
