wait.. the condom broke. ehh whatever i think im already 2 months pregnant
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
this hospital has no fireball
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
Randomize
