Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
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