That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
Even my vagina gasped.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
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