Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
Pretty sure he proposed because my house is awesome. His ass is a ten and he's offering to pay more than half the bills... How expensive is a divorce really? I mean I could probably put up with him for three or four years but a lifetime is a big ask.
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
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