Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
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