He asked to "fluff my boner.."
I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
Pretty sure he proposed because my house is awesome. His ass is a ten and he's offering to pay more than half the bills... How expensive is a divorce really? I mean I could probably put up with him for three or four years but a lifetime is a big ask.
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