Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
What am I supposed to say? "Oh hey, I can't go out with you tonight because I can't picture myself sleeping with you and I was high and just trying to be nice when I said yes"?
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