Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
How the hell does my fucking boss know about the goddamned magician I fucked?!?
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize