Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
So shortly after drunk sex...she starts crying and saying..." you don't care about me, you never do anything nice for me" so I called her a cab
Thank you for holding my vodka while the police let me ride their horse.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Randomize
