I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
We just shotgunned beers for America
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
Randomize
