I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
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